Downsizing Stinks

Today, a columnist at the Toronto Sun announced that the newspaper will soon be undergoing toilet downsizing. Due to building renovations by the owners, employees of the paper will no longer be able to roam six stories of building in order to find a good place to "go." The columnist quoted our friend and toilet science colleague Dr. Michael Sykes over at the ICBE about the etiquette of using the loo in close quarters with colleagues. Sykes says, “There’s work life and personal life, and by personal life I don’t mean what movies you’ve seen."

True enough. But I don't get a lump of fear in my throat when I think about going to the loo in close proximity to my colleagues. Well, I guess I do a little bit. It's always a bit harrying to see your boss coming in or out of the ladies (or men's) room. I once was walked in on by my boss on the first day of work, due to a faulty door lock. That was a trial by fire. And ice-breaker of sorts. But I don't get nervous about it because everyone has to do it. At some point in the day, you will, inevitably, have to find a place to relieve yourself, and so I balance discomfort at being around people you know with convenience and shortest distance traveled.

I'll take shortest distance traveled any day. Unless the bathroom itself is located in an uncomfortable spot, like, say a lobby. But I will say, having one bathroom for an entire company can certainly build a sense of community.

Anyway, if you want to read the full article, I highly recommend it.

Sign Me Up!

This week's post was submitted by Agent KGB in Boston. It's a post from Interbent that features "Humorous and Unclear Toilet Signs and Directions." Like the one above. The list reminds me of this one I saw in a bathroom in San Francisco early last spring.

There are also some Dada-ist looking signs, some highly suggestive, some alien-friendly, some, apparently, just for fun, and I really like the generic guy-on-toilet-seat-with-laptop - in a red circle with a slash mark through it, of course. And don't forget the Extreme Pizza bathroom for the "Extreme costumer only." So I'm guessing they only allow people who make or wear costumes in there...

Pitt Stop

The TP Blog is a big fan of when toilets make it into high-profile national media. So here we have Brad Pitt featured at the urinal in Wired Magazine's cover story on modern etiquette. The story - and image - were then picked up by NPR's Digital Culture section. I think this just goes to show how important the bathroom scene is to us, especially when it comes to rules of etiquette.

What I find perplexing in this photo is not Brad on his Blackberry, but that dude in the plaid suit next to him. What exactly is he doing? Futzing with the zipper? Shakin' off the tree? Who knows. But how embarrassing, for him. Maybe Brad was just checking his text messages so he wouldn't have to look and see what that guy was doing, since, obviously, someone was performing bad etiquette when they took the urinal next to the other guy. So much a no-no that it's the ICBE's logo.


{The International Center for Bathroom Etiquette}

There's a lot of other stuff in the Wired article, not just celebrities on toilets. For example it IS acceptable to text message someone while having a conversation. It is? I guess so. I've done it. But I always excuse myself when I do, because I know I'm not giving full attention to the other person so I feel it's slightly rude. Hey, maybe rude is the new black of polite society. I guess that makes me old fashioned.

But even though we now have photographic suggestive evidence that Brad does, indeed, relieve himself every once in a while, everyone knows female celebrities do not. For example, there was the famous Ashton Kutcher/Demi debate a while ago, wherein they had an online Twitter exchange about how to hang the toilet paper roll. About that same time, Ashton Tweeted once that his wife was about to go pee. Demi promptly corrected him and forced him to recant, subsequently stating that she neither pooped, farted, nor peed. Ever. And there you have it. Boys can pee. Girls, well, you'll never know. We gotta keep some of the mystery.